Are You Enabling Your Adult Child?

As a parent of an adult child who is struggling with addiction to drugs or alcohol, we can often feel conflicted on the best way to help. Our feelings of guilt, shame and worry often leave us blind to the fact that our child is manipulating us, lying to us or even stealing from us at the hands of their addiction. When we as parents keep our children from hitting a “bottom,” we are not being supportive, caring or loving, we are actually enabling and toxic.

Enabling our children may feel like love, but it is actually killing them.  Toxic enabling allows addiction to continue longer than it might if you set boundaries with your child. Enabling increases the risk of incarceration, overdose and death and decreases the opportunity to jumpstart recovery.

The following questions can help determine if you are enabling your adult child:

-Do you fear that your adult child will be angry, ignore or “disappear” when you say “no” or set a boundary? -Do you believe that your actions or inactions could be what cause your adult child to relapse or recover? -Are you constantly taking responsibility for the problems of your adult child, attempting to solve the problems of your adult child, i.e bailing out of jail, paying for lawyer, paying for cell phone bills, etc.? -Have you been allowing your adult child to use your fears as a way to manipulate your emotions in dangerous situations? Ex: “If you don’t help me with money/let me use the car, I will never speak to you again.” -Do you feel yourself becoming overly controlling out of fear of the “what-ifs?” -Do you believe that loving your adult child also means rescuing them from drug or alcohol related problems/consequences?

Amatus Recovery Center's Can Help You Stop Enabling and Start Healing!

If you answered yes to any of these questions, don’t worry. Many parents struggle with toxic enabling, especially when the stakes feel so high. Speak to one of our treatment specialists today about how to stop toxic enabling. Our treatment specialists will create a step by step path to help your family end the cycle of addiction and move towards a path of recovery.

Amatus Recovery Centers owns and operates 11 treatment facilities across the country that offer a full continuum of care in addiction treatment. Whether you are in search of medical detox from drugs or alcohol to long-term group therapy and aftercare, Amatus Recovery Centers will help you. To find out which level of care is the right one for you, call to speak to one of our admissions specialist today at 833-216-3079.  Amatus Recovery Centers, a division of Amatus Health, offers treatment for drug and alcohol addiction as well as co-occurring mental health disorders in facilities across the country.  To learn more visit

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The greatest goal of our program is to give each individual the tools and strategies to eliminate or deal with harmful stress and triggers that have affected their lives. We try to maximize the amount of time you are in safe, secure, recovery focused living community. Stressor will remain out there, but we will help you build the ability to deal with them, and find peace and fulfillment while living clean and sober. We will help you plan for the next steps, with input from your entire therapy team. Our medical team, case managers and therapists will be there to advise you through the next steps.

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